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Tuesday, December 7, 2010

BUY NOW AND GET A FREE CHAINSAW AND A 55GAL. DRUM OF "ROUND-UP"*restriction apply







5'7" asymmetrical for all you pluto footers(not goofy)
the super leashloop returns
inlay from friends closet curtains
resin pigmenation and pinlineralistication...that sounds really official
with a thrustration set up
give a hoot...the core is made of one big mushroom

*restriction for MEGA DEALIO OF THE CENTURY 2000...if you are human, and are paying with cash, check, credit, debit, travelers checks, money orders, monopoly money, or cheetah fur...this offer does not apply

some more FAQ's

Q: do you make ipod holders for surfboards?
A:...if i deny the fact that you exist, will you disappear?  when Osama Bin Laden hugs the Pope, i'll make an ipod holder for your stupid surfboard

Q: what is the difference between epoxy and poly resin?
A:  epoxy resin will make you forget your phone number...poly resin will make you forget your name.

Q: how durable are your boards?
A:  i dont want anyone to have the misconception that my boards are indestructible...they are not.  i would rather people think of them more as cockroaches, and unless you are an 800lb. gorilla wearing tap dancing shoes, you cant squash the little buggers.  so, not indestructible, just disgustingly resilient.

Q: will this board bring a sense of validity and respect to me and my surfing when others see me carry it to the water?
A: have you ever tried to count cigarette butts on the side of the highway while going 70mph

Q:i want to get a custom board for my dog to surf on, what would you recommend?
A:  http://www.ihavewaytoomuchtimeandmoneyonmyhands.com/

Q: are your asymmetrical boards only good for one direction.
A: they are only good at going one direction at a time, but if you turn them or go the other way while on the wave they will go in that one direction just as well.  i have yet to see a board that will go in 2 direction.  that seems uncomfortable to think about.

Q:will north korea want to nuke me because i am riding your boards?
A: I think that north korea wants to nuke everyone, so i dont really see how this is relevant.

Q:what is the plural form of platypus?
A: i dont know, but i hope that it is platypies...because it is fun to say and it makes me think of dessert on Thanksgiving.

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